What am I doing again?

I went into polytechnic, pursuing an IT course because my interest was in technology and computers, er.. make that computer games.

So I'm out of poly now.

What am I doing again?

My skills suck. Seriously. All my projects screwed up and I feel like I let down all my team mates that were with me.

So I conclude I am actually one of the lazy asses that didn't manage to do anything right.

T_T

Career..

I don't communicate easily with people so sales marketing is kind of out.

Gah actually no need to think this is more or less the best industry I can work in already. I just need to actually do something.

WTF man. I just sat around and watched everyone else do great stuff while I played Oblivion (which I don't even want to play now, since its starting to be a grind) [more than 150hrs on that lame shit and I didn't even complete the story, since I've spent it all on other quests and that lame x5 times slower exp rate]

I can't blame it on others influence.. Even though they look slack and do nothing, but things still appear.. or wait they just get other people to do it for them. Or something.

I find that I'm looking for people to learn from, to be inspired from, to be friends with. But those people with the real talent, I cannot find. Or, I can't catch up with them. Yes, I can't because I think its too hard and I can't be bothered.

Why so much time into training in games? I can't even find the pros to play with to turn pro. Can I even turn pro?

What about drumming? Guitar? ...

I'm going into the army soon. Will the people there influence me?

That's for sure, but how much is up to me, right? Negligible, will be nice.

Set my goals straight and work towards it, and not "heck care" everything.

So I've not been bothered with what is important, huh.

Not being bothered plus lazy is a bad combination when it comes to important things.